I’m doing a switch up today. The bad news is that my mood has changed to frazzled. The GOOD news is that I know WHY, and I can fix it!
The other good news is that I took this photo today, and it really seems to fit frazzled. At least I think it does. I’m not even sure what that is, stuck to the lights that we have on the patio… but I got the shot! 😉
Which brings me to why I’m frazzled. I went to two different places today, took quite a few photos, and at the end of the day, I ended up with THIS (taken while sitting in the backyard). The one and only photo from today that I really cared for.
If you’ve been following my story, you know that PURSUIT is/was one of my biggest problems. Pursuing alcohol, pursuing love, pursuing money or things… on and on, and on.
What I’m coming to realize is that YES, I love photography and that won’t change (I know I keep saying that)… but I have GOT to cool my jets a little. Sometimes I wake up and I could swear I took my camera to bed with me! Obsess much?!?
Oh, I’m exaggerating. But the truth of the matter is that recently I’ve found myself experiencing mood swings, based upon my photo successes (or failures) on any given day.
So, that got me thinking, and I’m seeing that my FUN hobby is slowly evolving into a NOT QUITE AS FUN pursuit. I’m chasing something again. I want to be better. I want clearer pictures. I want them more colorful. I want better black and whites. I want more interesting subjects. I want a better zoom. I want, I want, I WANT. (Of course, a better camera would help… but I’m not going to go off on that tangent right now!)
I guess my point is that ANYTHING can become an addiction if I let it get out of control. I read a great poem on another blog the other day.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I was born and addict… and so were you.
I think everyone is capable of overdoing something to the point of it not being healthy, no?
Anyway, I’m going to write tonight. Gil read my last Confessions story and he wants to hear about my marriage. The good, the bad and the ugly. I guess he and I never really talked about that much. I’m thinking this will be good. I’m going to type it all out and get rid of it once and for all. Maybe I’ll print out the email and then have a burn the pages ceremony.
I’m also super excited about writing the next segment; I AM WHOLE. That part is going to be jam packed with happy stuff. 🙂
The bottom line is that I’m stepping away from the camera for a day, maybe two. I’m going to write and I am going to read.
Balance. I must maintain balance.
My mantra for this week!
Peace and Love!