Art, Growth, Photography, The Journey

Light Trickles

Indecision may or may not be my problem. -Jimmy Buffet

After altering this photograph enough times I decided to go for the variety pack image… (thanks for the suggestion Nickel boy) hence the somewhat applicable quote. 😉

I think the purple negative at bottom right is actually my favorite. Below are clickable versions for anyone interested.


After all of the reading I’ve been doing it was nice to sit and clear my head by working on this. But I’ll get back to my reading soon. I am absolutely fascinated by all things relating to psychology.

More and more light trickles in as I discover things about our minds, our personalities, and society- and it really HAS helped me with the whole self-acceptance thing. You know… something I realized is that it’s not looking back at my old self that gets me off track and feeling a little “less than”… it’s looking too far ahead.

I do believe that God is taking me to amazing places, but spending too much of my time and energy trying to zero in on what I think the future will (or should) look like is what’s been tripping me up. Especially when you consider that I spend a lot of time in my head.

It was SO enlightening to see the light! The past is gone, and I’ve let go of that… but trying to peer into the future is what’s been stealing my NOW moments. Not only do I miss what’s in front of me, but my self-acceptance starts to diminish- because I am HERE- NOT THERE… not in that futuristic imaginary place that I so vividly painted in my mind.

ONE STEP AT A TIME needs to be my mantra these days. I’ve already learned what God thinks about shortcuts, so the next indicated step is the only step I need to take. I’ll never be a thousand steps ahead if I don’t take those 999 other steps that lead there!

My old self was always in a hurry. Trying to get 1000 steps ahead in ONE death defying leap. 😉 But, no more!

Anyway… I guess it all comes back to living in the present, which I already knew! But I accept the fact that I forget– remind myself…

…and here I am again!

Right HERE, Right NOW! Being present! 🙂


Life is good, and God is GREAT! Love you guys!! Off to catch up on some of your posts! xo

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Tidbits

Strut Your Stuff

I want to live in a world where a chicken can cross the road without its motives being questioned. 

I failed to mention that while I was busy babysitting the pugs, I also had to keep an eye on three chickens. It appears that I live in a world of threes!

Anyway, I just wanted to share this one. I have more images- probably even better ones, but I really liked the fact that you can see her strutting. And she is beautiful!

Peace and Love….

 

ACTION: Any Change Toward Improving Ones Nature.

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Art, Photography

Painting the Sky

The sky grew darker, painted blue on blue, one stroke at a time, into deeper and deeper shades of night. Haruki Murakami, Dance Dance Dance

I’ve been dog sitting since Friday and hope to share some interesting images later in the week. I brought my camera… but forgot the USB cable! That’s OK. It forced me to stay off of the computer all weekend, and I needed that. And I had a relaxing movie marathon!

And I sit here still… surrounded by three adorable, snoring pugs.

I decided to work on one image this evening and I found another archive taken from from a moving car. After some coloring and some obvious artwork… there you have it.

A Painted Sky. 

My interview Thursday went well and it’s possible they’ve matched me to a part time position that sounds perfect for me. I’ll know more this week. And I’m enrolling in a Writer’s Workshop that starts in June! I’m SUPER excited!

Peace & Love!

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digital art, Growth, journaling, Tidbits

Love & Acceptance

Most people need love and acceptance a lot more than they need advice. Bob Goff

I forgot to include something in my previous post. I was trying to watch my word count, and I left out an important part of the story; which was the reason that I chose to do the visualization of my inner critic in the first place!

My friend that asked me to share Saturday night spoke after me, and something he said really stuck with me. About love and acceptance.

There’s something that I’ve felt I lacked… you know… that something that was holding me back from being more of service before. I thought perhaps it was the thought that I didn’t know enough, or maybe I didn’t have enough sobriety time, or…. ??

The point is that I’ve never been able to pinpoint what it was that was holding me back.

There are two sayings in the program that baffled me, because they are almost conflicting. One is you can’t transmit something you haven’t got… and the second is that you have to give it away to keep it.

I have God and I have sobriety. I have peace, and joy, and serenity (most of the time). But something still didn’t seem right. What was I missing?!? Did I have IT or NOT?

Anyway… his share was about having love and acceptance for yourself. Because if you don’t have THAT, you can’t very well transmit it.

Wow. Was I ever glad that I went to that meeting. That’s what I’ve been missing!

In doing the 4th step (my fearless and searching moral inventory), and in learning about humility, so much time, focus, and energy had to be spent on discovering what was wrong with me. My faulty beliefs, my wrong thoughts and actions, and my character defects.

And I totally understand that, and am so grateful that God opened my eyes!

But, somewhere in the process… that nasty inner critic of mine took up residency and he likes to hammer away at me. Not constantly, but usually about the time that everything seems to be going really well. That’s when he starts sending me negative messages. Those imaginary roadblocks; like fear and doubt.

I know that God loves me. There is no question there. He has removed the desire to drink from me, and has shown me how to live. But sometimes my light just doesn’t SHINE.

How can I shine if I’m not feeling good about myself?!?

YES… I need to keep an eye on my thoughts, actions and motives… But NO… I can’t allow that old negative geezer to pick me apart.

So that’s what prompted this. And things are going GREAT.

I’ve got some new ideas for writing and images, something that will benefit others, and I will share more as things unfold. In the meantime, I have an interview tomorrow at a staffing agency. Just for some temp work while I get things back in order. Well, that’s the plan anyway.

Life is good and God is GREAT.

Peace and Love Everyone!!

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Art, Growth, The Journey

Food For Thought

First of all, I was asked to do a panel Saturday night. When I got there and saw my friend behind a podium (with a microphone!)… I almost lost my cookies. And yes… that is what I had to do. Share my story in front of a fairly large group from behind that podium. That’s a FIRST for me, for sure.

One good thing about “telling your story” is that you really can’t mess it up, because it IS your story! It never changes! Overall I think it went well. Which leads me to the point of my post…

My inner critic.

Let the Lunatics Out of the Attic

I read the coolest thing in a book on introverts. Visualizing your inner critic. I’m sharing it with you because there must be someone else out there who could benefit from it. That’s my guess anyway.

So, the inner critic starts out looking like a big ogre. A large, mean and very grumpy looking character. He looks a bit like a judge; wearing a robe, a frown and holding a gavel. Why he’s a HE I don’t know… you tell me (that’s supposed to be humorous).

He says things like “you can’t do that!;” “you’re not doing enough!” or “You don’t know enough!”

Sound familiar?

Anyway… this guy just got an overhaul. We changed his look, AND his demeanor. Now he’s a cool looking dude with a hat, flip flops, shorts and a Hawaiian shirt. And he only says encouraging things. “Nice job!” — “You’re doing great!” — “Don’t worry… you are right where you need to be!”.

So… that’s what I’ve been practicing, and I can tell you it’s made a huge difference. And what’s funny is that I don’t have to do it much. Just knowing that this new guy rolled into town seems to be enough to keep that old grouchy judge at bay. He’s learning that he’s no longer in charge, and that he’s not allowed to spill out his negativity.

I’ve been looking forward to sharing this because it really IS very helpful.

Don’t worry—be happy.
And stay cool man.

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