Something eye opening happened recently.
I had been holding off on writing a life-journal update because it seemed there was nothing exciting to share. Eventually I did—in my No News is Good News post—but by the time I sat down to write I was tired. What I failed to mention is that I had one of those aha moments just prior to writing.
Years ago, when I was struggling and extremely anxious about the circumstances that I found myself in, I walked into a church (this was before I was a believer) and talked with a woman inside. As it happened, she was also a therapist. Long story short—after listening to me rant, she said that what ‘she was hearing’ was that I wasn’t running my life, my life was running me.
I had a very passive existence at the time. I drifted through life (although it was more like major turbulence), and waited for things to “happen.” Allowing life to unfold naturally is part of serenity (acceptance), but what I’m talking about is different.
I’m talking about never having a plan, and constantly making bad decisions. When things went south, which they inevitably always did, I’d feel helpless. I would cry out, blaming the ‘crooked’ people around me. Some of my cohorts WERE crooked, mind you, but they were in my life because I had made that choice.
My point is… although that woman never knew it, her words had an impact on me. When I was staring at the screen, mulling over the gloom of having nothing new to share, her words came back to me. I realized that I was waiting again; waiting for something to happen.
Money is tight right now, and I can’t afford to do much. School takes up most of my time. Well, yes, I am on summer break right now, but it’s too hot outside. Plus, my car is old. I worry about driving too far and the A/C doesn’t work. Gas is expensive too!
Are you seeing a pattern here? I have an endless supply of excuses.
There’s some irony for you; Endless Rivers of Hope has an endless river of excuses. Ha! 🙂 Nothing is happening because I’ve been waiting for it to happen. I could plan something, but I have too many excuses.
So… that’s what happened. Some woman took the time to listen to me years ago, and she offered me words of wisdom. Those words came back full circle, my eyes were opened (again), and I’m sitting down to make some plans.
Woo-Hoo!! Something exciting is happening!
“You never know when a moment and a few sincere words can have an impact on a life.”
I did a remake of an old photograph here, for another partial portrait. My friend and I were on the Santa Monica pier that day. I’ve always loved the reflection in her glasses. You can see the boardwalk, and the people walking by. That was a great day.
Peace & Love everyone… Have a beautiful weekend!